There are hundreds of books on human baby names, so many that we even list spelling variations of the more popular ones.
But in all my travels, I’ve yet to find a book titled “Bovine Sobriquets: It’s High Steaks” written by Harold B. Hereford. As a result, ranchers are forced to spend large amounts of their thousand yard stare time thinking of new and exciting handles for their charges.
So far this year we have:
Shiskabob Crane (Bob)
Cookies and cream (Daughter of Oreo)
Quarter pounder (tag #25)
Charlene (the Charolais)
Why bother you might ask? Because there are many times that a given name is just necessary to stress the importance of a situation. They might go in the book as a tag number, but yelling “34 get out of the barn!” Just doesn’t cut it. Looking at you Gingersnap.
With more babies due any day and stretching into the fall, if you see me gazing off into the distance, presumably pondering the deep and abiding mysteries of the universe, just save me the trouble and give me your best bovine bonafides.
Sourwood Hill 